I remember the feeling
When we first started seeing;
I was sick by then
Of dissecting amoeba's assholes.
Ask me later, alligator:
I'll tell you tomorrow
Of my theories on our sorrows.
We didn't see that, our first morrow.
Yes, I recall that lukewarm day,
The sun radiating a dull, sandy glow.
I remember meeting you, that day;
I didn't expect all this, though.
Daring David dipped Janette,
A Christmas party of just a duet.
George Michael claimed he couldn't dance,
But we hadn't heard about him yet.
You'd said you wanted
A pretty & pleasing companion.
A Regular Riannon.
I wasn't easily daunted.
We entangled in new-fangled fashions.
We took a chance,
Acting on that first fleeting glance.
Did we ever have passion to lose?
You took me to see Time Cop in theaters.
You held my hand --
We praised the multitude of Van Damme's creators,
While you shouted, "Strike up the band!"
I grew weak in funny places.
There were tastes I lost;
These days, it's about saving face.
How else would I diffuse you, being crossed?
Do you remember our
Wally's Waterworld honeymoon?
Back then, I would never cower
When you stepped in to a room.
"I don't want to spend
Every second with you."
13 years of it seems unlucky.
We made it over a decade, us two.
Am I what you expected?
Did we both change, or is this a trap?
So, all this therapy is elected
To save us from reaching a final rap.
Tell me, David --
Are there things you'd wanted me to save?
Go ahead, Daring Dipshit David:
Are there parts of us I should have saved?